Friday 4th March (The Chirpy Cockney Sparrer)

Mr. Kite looked out of his bedroom window onto a dull morning. Today Mr. Kite and his Lady were catching Uncle Gus to Hampstead. So after breakfast they walked to town and met Uncle Gus who transported them to sunny Hampstead.

Before catching Uncle Gus Mr. Kite bought a newspaper to read on the journey. In this newspaper was an article headlined, 'Why do sparrows thrive in America but not here?'; written by Michael McCarthy. Being a bird-watcher Mr. Kite read this article with interest. The article refers to 'a sparrow expert' called Denis Summers- Smith whose hypothesis is that the decline of the House Sparrow is due to air pollution and caused by the soot particles produced by diesel exhausts.

Reading this on the journey Mr. Kite believed that this could be true. Now this made Mr. Kite think carefully about Uncle Gus who was bombing down the Frog and Toad pumping out millions of particles. Is he partly responsible for the decline of the Chirpy Cockney Sparrer?

To make matters worse Mr. Kite's holiday home is a diesel emission particle distributor and travels thousands of miles every year reducing the numbers of 'sparrers'. To cut along story short Mr. Kite arrive in Hampstead and started looking for House Sparrows whilst walking to 'The Residence'. He did not see one or hear one. An late afternoon walk produced the same result although he did see a Blue Tit and Feral Pigeon.

Now Mr. Kite had a good day even though he did not meet 'The Chirpy Cockney Sparrer'. But he did have a tipple and Pig's Ear of Guiness. Cheers from a quiet Mr. Kite and a good health to all House Sparrows and remember; 'turn off that damned diesel'.