Saturday 12th February (The Shorts were not Long Enough)

Mr. Kite looked out of his bedroom window onto a cool breezy road. Standing there in his silky stylish track suit bottoms he knew that warmer clothing was needed if he was going bird watching. With a fridge full of beer and a cool breeze blowing he put on his warmer track suit and prepared the beast for a short trip. Today Mr. Kite was overwhelmed by the selection of beer in the fridge. Mallards, Teal, Shoveler and Tufted Duck are pretty good to see but that amber nectar is the next best thing.

Anyway Mr. Kite set off at midday with his super telescope to Monkmoor Lagoon in his long track suit bottoms. He would have preferred his shorts but those cool clouds kept appearing. When Mr. Kite arrived at the hide he was warm and comfortable. Setting up his telescope he watched ten Mute Swans preening and jockeying for position in the pecking order. The males cobbs ruffled up their feathers to look larger whilst the female penns tended to their plumage ensuring that every feather was in place. Now as we all know size does matter, so the males looked big and tried to look bigger and out do each other but with the breeding season approaching they tried to look their best but were unsure of who was the biggest and the most desirable. At this stage in the proceeding it is all about looks. Short fuses and bad tempers do not attract mates so the male cobbs hissed and fluttered to show their irritation and manliness.

Swan etiquette is similar to ours. Don't be aggressive or show your uncouth habits but you are a man amongst men and female swans want a dominant male swan. Mr. Kite watched as the hissing became louder between the cobbs. The powerful tails swung from side to side suggesting a strength that has yet to be tested. Through all this the female penns grazed nonchalantly on the pickings. The males arched their wings and powered their way through the water to show their strength. This was just like boxers sparring; the gloves were on but the punches were pulled. So Mr. Kite watched the warm up knowing that the battle will not begin yet and their is no love lost between them.

With rain approaching Mr. Kite cycled home to enjoy a tipple of Green King Abbot Ale, Becks Lager and Marstons Double Drop. Cheers from a very thirsty Mr. Kite.